The Day the Bottom Fell out.

"You know, it's hard for me to trust you when I don't have actual proof one way or the other.  We could survive an affair, it's the lying that I would have trouble forgiving."  He's still agitated.  He throws his arms up and says "Well, you might as well assume that I fucked her then!"  I asked quietly "Did you?"

......No answer.

"Did you?!"

......No answer.  He won't even look at me.

"Okay, I'm going to assume by your lack of answer that you did."

 [Pause]

"DID YOU??"

"I did," he whispered as the tears started to fall.

He sent the kids up to their room and then began to recount what actually happened throughout the last 7 months.  How he would tell me that he was going shooting and would go to her house instead.  How the day he had her over to help me get ready for my party, they fucked in my bathroom.  How he told me that he was driving some friends around for his bachelor party and spent the night at her house instead.  How he went her house THE DAY after our third child was born because he was upset that we weren't doing anything for his birthday - since I was still in the hospital.

I felt my whole body go numb.  I could hear the words he was saying, but I felt like I was having an out of body experience.  This was not my life.  This was not my husband.  This is not the person that I have known and loved for nearly half my lifetime.  THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!!!  I was in utter and complete shock.

We talked for quite a while.  He let me ask any questions that I had, pausing only to wipe his tears or blow his nose.  We had the calmest conversation that we've had to date about The Whore.  Eventually we both grew tired and decided to try and get some sleep.  He easily slipped into a slumber.  I, on the other hand, tossed and turned for most of the night.  I had images of the two of them, conversations between The Mister and I, conversations between The Whore and I, conversations between The Mister and The Whore, and  revenge plans running through my head all night.  I think I got a total of about 45 minutes of sleep.